Making Arrangements for a Funeral, Commonly known as The Burial of The Dead
Planning Ahead
Most people do not want to think about their own death, but as Christians, we are admonished to do just that. We are to be in a state of grace at all times for death, which comes like a thief in the night – no one knows the day or hour.
In the Book of Common Prayer, Office for the Visitation of the Sick, the priest is advised to “inquire of the sick person as to his acceptance of the Christian Faith, and as to whether he repent him truly of his sins, and be in charity with all the world; exhorting him to forgive from the bottom of his heart, all persons that have offended him; and if he hath offended any other, to ask them forgiveness; and where he hath done injury or wrong to any man, that he make amends to the uttermost of his power.” (p. 313) This is how we should be striving, by God’s Grace, to be living every day.
Additionally, the prayer book states “The minister is ordered, from time to time, to advise the People, whilst they are in health, to make Wills arranging for the disposal of their temporal goods, and when of ability, to leave Bequests for religious and charitable uses.” (p. 320) Although not affecting our salvation, this is a Christian Responsibility, so that at our death our temporal affairs are not mired in probate, and our grieving relatives made anxious about discerning our intention concerning our earthly estate. It is an act of love and charity to make these arrangements before we die.
The Rites of the Church
Just as the Church, as the Body of Christ, is intimately tied to our sanctification through the Sacraments of Baptism, Communion, Confirmation, marriage and/or Ordination, and Reconciliation (forgiveness of sins), so too the Church is involved at the time of our Death, administering the Sacrament of Unction. It is a great comfort near the time of death to receive anointing, the opportunity to receive the sacrament of reconciliation, and the Holy Communion. Please be sure to call the Priest if you or a loved one is in imminent danger of death.
After death, you are entitled to the Rites of the Church for your burial. These have evolved and changed over the years. IT IS PREFERABLE THAT YOU BE BURIED BY THE CHURCH, since it is the place where you began your Christian journey at the Baptismal Font, and where the sacramental milestones of your life have been administered.
Requiem Communion Service
From the earliest days of the Church, it was the tradition to have the burial service in the context of Holy Communion, since it is the tangible way in which we are connected to our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ both on earth and in the afterlife. Additionally, the reception of the Sacrament of our Lord’s Body and Blood is an assurance of Grace and is of great comfort for those who mourn. This is the recommended service.
The Burial Office
Beginning on page 324 in The Book of Common Prayer, this simple service can be done at the Funeral Home or at the Church. It is a relatively short service and can be done with or without music.
MUSIC – will you or your family want to hire the services of our organist, or even have a quartet from our choir to lead worship? This is an expense that must be paid for by the family. If the answer to one or both is yes, then you will perhaps pick out hymns that you would like sung – perhaps a favorite of yours or your family.
BURIAL or CREMATION – The church recognizes both of these as viable options, in addition to the donation of organs/body for medical use and research.
INTERNMENT – Where would you like your remains to be buried? Burial or Internments plots can be purchased ahead of time, including Columbarium niches for ashes at St. John’s.
Expenses
We often hear horror stories about funeral expenses. Making pre-arrangements with a funeral home for your burial will help to prevent impulsive grief or guilt laden over-spending by your family. Remember the most expensive and least expensive caskets and vaults will end up on the same place – unseen in the ground.
There is never a charge for the Rites of the Church, but some people do like to make an offering.
There are some Church expenses incurred for a funeral. The suggested donation for the Church is $100. An honorarium is suggested for the priest as well.
If you are having music, expect a fee for the organist. If you would like a quartet from our professional choir, expect a fee for the members of the quartet (subject to the availability of the singers). These prices are subject to change. Contact the Church Office for the amount of the fees.
Making This Known
All of these arrangements are of no use unless you let your family know what your wishes are, and what arrangements have been made. The church is willing to keep this list of your wishes in our files for future reference, which would be superseded by any other instructions you might give to your family afterwards. Below is a link for form you may complete and keep with your records, and/or complete and bring to the church.